2 Way 9 Language Voice Translator for $499

Now you really buy a hands-free two way voice translator with capability to translate to and from 9 languages in real-time for 499$ at SkyMall. If the marketing is half as true as the real product I will be amazed. This is the first step in the direction of a truly universal translator which has been the foundation of almost all Sci-Fi movies involving aliens. Frankly I could use it to speak proper Spanish or Kannadiga. Here’s what you get for 499.94$:

• Built-in Fodor’s travel guide for 50 major destinations on 5 continents
• Integrated CIA World Factbook for 180 countries; my old palm pilot can do that too.
• Audio Guide to major museums
• 2-way full text translation system from English to Chinese, French, German, Italian, Polish, Portuguese, Russian, Spanish and vice versa
• Language Teacher — speech recognition and speech analyzer based innovative language learning system
• 1,600,000 words audiovisual dictionary — including general words, idioms, medical, technical, legal, business terms, as well as slang and useful expressions
• Princeton WordNet English dictionary
• Audio player etc.

“Freedom of speech is in your pocket - Say any of 63,000 phrases and have them instantly translated and spoken out loud. ” Hat Tip: Gizmodo.

I have a feeling that it is exactly what it says - a phrase translator. Unless your vocabulary is akin to wham-bam-… I don’t think you can carry out a meaningful conversation with another sane human being. But then for once I would love to be wrong. Imagine the possibilities of an universal translator - now you can shout obscenities while killing the Iraqi’s (or any foreign enemies) in their own language, have trans-continental romances with say an Amzonian or Hutuian, shout in Japanese while concluding a business deal in Tokyo or ask for the local delicacies when you are really asking for a 99C McBurger.

iTRAVL includes 2 free gifts one of which is Universal Translator ML350, a text translator. The dimensions are 3.2 x 5.7 x 0.6 inch. You can buy it here.

The red herring is that it runs on Microsoft Windows. Imagine Bush having a conversation with Kremlin on NPT & ICBM reduction while iTRAVL gives a General Protection Fault or better yet my favorite - General Blue Screen of Death. Or imagine you are in the shady areas of Mexico trying to wiggle your way out with your precious life intact and your trusty translator when suddenly you get a nice blue screen of death with garbage characters… as I said the possibilities are endless but I wouldn’t trust my life or business with it yet.