How to make millions of dollars by blogging

It is simple, really. The technique described here is so simple that you won’t be able to believe your ears. I have been observing it over the years and soon realized it is a great money making technique to follow. I now present you the greatest money making technique online in 5 simple steps and I won’t charge you a penny for it.

Note: I am not talking about spam blogs / splogs.

1. Brag about your blog income

Tell people you earn 5/6/7 figure income from blogging. Show a Google AdSense check after photoshopping it to insert your name and your chosen amount. Large numbers make a dramatic effect and you will be talked about for months or even years. Tell them how much you earned in last month (again can be a fictitious amount).

Note: I am not saying that everyone claiming large amount from blogging is lying. Some bloggers like Jason Calacanis has been proved to be earning great income from blogging, so much that he could sell his blogs to Aol for several millions.

However looking at how many bloggers claim to earn such huge amount, I would have to say a lot of the numbers are suspect.

2. Brag about how you are greatest blogger in your country

It is easy to claim you are the best blog in any genre if you don’t have to show solid numbers to prove it. If you are an honest blogger making such a claim then you should use quantcast metrics (which accurately measures and displays web site metrics by inserting code in your site like a regular analytics software), Sitemeter, or gadging, which shows relative ranking at this time from Google analytics data etc.  In short you need to prove your claim with widely accepted independent site analytics software which displays reults publicly. However if you want to make millions quick, why bother with accuracy? Just claim that you are the greatest xyz blogger in your country. If people find out certain analytics software do not agree with your boast then write an article to trash the software and then praise inaccurate metrics like Alexa, which are widely ridiculed, because it can be easily gamed to show stats in your favor.

Use this boast to arrange interviews with print and news media, who rarely factcheck (a t least in India) such claims and are quick to pounce upon any sensational news. All of these will increase the popularity of your previously unknown blog and take you well on the way to popularity.

Note: This becomes hard if you are from US and most major bloggers are there and people know about them.

3. Teach people about blogging, organize conference & seminars

Blogging is probably the easiest thing to learn only after taking a dump. And yet there are so many so called experts that teach you how to blog. They even hold conferences, seminars and workshops on blogging. Unfortunately many non-techies get lured into the trap and pay to attend such phony conferences. You can literally rake in millions here, especially if you have developed a reputation before for being the “greatest” blogger in your country / domain.

4. Write meta articles on making money

You don’t have to know about anything to blog. For example, you don’t need to make any money to blog about money making. Just re-hash concepts floating in the internet and present it as the greatest discovery since sliced bread. Tell them how much you are making by using them and don’t forget to insert your photoshopped check again for effect. People will throng to your blog to know how to make money and will click on ads to get the hell out of there as there isn’t much to learn.

5. Write e-books

This is as simple as blogging. Again all you need to do is re-hash old concepts and present them within the glossy cover of your book with such enthusiasm that would have made Sister Teresa blush. This is another big money making idea. After all you are the “greatest blogger” who is making millions blogging, so even your piss is golden.

Recap: How to make millions by blogging

1, 2 & 4 will make your blog very popular quickly and you will really start earning good money from AdSense and better ad programs. 3 & 5 directly contributes to the bottomline. If you follow this steps meticulously then you will surely earn millions by blogging, maybe within 6 months.

Why would you believe me? If my reputation as a long-time blogger (check my blog history here and on taragana.blogspot.com; blogging since 2001 ) isn’t enough to convince you then I can easily whip out a million dollar check from Google (photoshooped obviously) to make you believe. What would you like? Truth or yet another fake AdSense check? The choice is yours.

Obligatory disclaimer: I don’t make millions monthly from blogging and I don’t know anyone personally who does. I also know a little bit about the money making from blogs.

Note: No animals or humans were harmed in creating this article. Any resemblence to any existing bloggers is probably a conincidence.